Speech Therapy

Photo courtesy of Waridikenya.com wedding planners.

Wedding Speeches can be boring!!!! Actually most of the times weddings speeches are boring!!!

They drag on and on and on, and to be quite honest very few people including the couple are often attentive. In fact I think speeches tend to the most dreaded part of a wedding reception! Would it be delightful if you went to a wedding reception and there were no boring speeches! Where speech representatives would dispense their pearls of wisdom in an interesting manner that would captivate the wedding guest audience. Where the bride and groom would remember, many years to come, what each of the speech representatives said and actually applied some of that wisdom in the marriage. Wouldn't it be great if all weddings had great speech sessions. Well believe it or not it is possible!!!

If you are as tired as I am of going to boring wedding receptions. If you do not want to see your wedding guests nodding away In your wedding video well read on:

It all begins with the reception program:

Speeches are commonly held between the 3-4th hour of the wedding reception, this is between 2-3.30 . FACT, at this time most wedding guests are nodding off cause of the heavy meal that your  wedding caterer  served surely its impossible to blame them.

I would recommend not having an entire time slot dedicated to speeches alone for your wedding reception program. Mix and match the speeches. Have abit of entertainment in between speeches it works!! The entertainment whether a dance or song will keep your wedding guests awake, and would definitely want them  to stay awake for more.

If you are feeling inspired you can even put in a wedding game in between the speeches. For example you can divide all your wedding guest tables into 5 groups. So if you have 60 tables you have 12 groups, and assign each group to giving you one pearl of wisdom about an aspect of life for example marriage, kids, dancing, how to iron a shirt e.t.c.  Have interesting aspects of life that will leave your guests in stitches. This activity could be done in between  speeches. All that you would require is a cordless mic!!

Selecting who to speak:

Who will speak at your wedding is a choice left to you and your partner. Often we delegate this to our parents , but I think this should be entirely left to the couple to decide. Reason,  its their big day, they should enjoy it not be bored stiff by their mother's colleague whose second name they don’t even know! Select individuals who have been part and parcel of your life as a couple, who have seen you grow together. They deserve the honor of speaking at your wedding.

Locally, a lot of couple's choose family representatives who happen to be uncles and aunties to speak. Most of these speak about the good old days when your partner used to ran around the hood in diapers e.t.c. In the western world the people who often speak are the fathers of both the bride and the groom, the maid of honor and the Bestman.

The fathers of the bride and groom speak on behalf of the respective mothers and most of the time give the couple practical advice for their life after I do. The maid of honor and the Bestman, who are chosen because they are special to the couple, speak about the couple's relationship and also give them pearls of wisdom.

We also encourage the couple to speak and at least say the vote of thanks to their friends and family for making the day truly memorable. Your vote of thanks need not be scripted but you ought to remember everyone who helped out on the wedding day. In case you may be emotionally overwhelmed or may be stage phobic, you can have your vote of thanks printed out on the wedding day program.

Your wedding speech representatives should be:

• People who you have a close relationship with.
• People who have witnessed your growth as a couple.
• People who are special to you as a couple.

What they will speak about?

This depends on the individual, but you can choose to script or provide guidelines to the speech representatives. To avoid repetition meet the speech representatives during the wedding rehearsal and have them synchronize their thoughts if they are open to the idea. Your Mcee should ensure that what is being spoken about will be beneficial to the couple.

Your wedding speech representatives should:

• Have their speech written out in a language that will be understood by all. Avoid vernacular.
•  Avoid using crude, obscene or rude language that may offend the guests.
• Have jokes, interesting examples and quotations to make the speech interesting.
• Have background music playing , instrumental solo's are ideal for speech backgrounds.

How long will they speak?

Every speech representative should be allocated a particular number of minutes/ hours that they are required to speak. My ideal would be between 5-10 minutes. Have consequences to one going overboard the requested time e.g. the mcee could sneakily cue the speech representative. A speech should be about delivering your advice in the shortest, simplest of ways. It should be memorable not an ordeal.

You wedding speech representatives should:

• Be mindful of time and should be aware of the time allowance they each have.
• Be aware of the cue, the dj should be instructed to play an instrumental background once the ten minutes are over to make the speech representative wind up.

Have a copy of the program to know what time they will be expected to speak.

Apart from speeches are there other ways your guest can dispense pearls of wisdom?

YES!!!

Your wedding guests can be involved in giving your life advice in a number of ways:

Videotape advice: Have your wedding videographer/ a relative with a camcorder record bits of advice that your wedding guests may have. This can be put in a separate dvd and you and your partner can watch it after all the wedding fuss is over! The videographer can be stationed at booth where guests come and give their advice.

Have a guest scrap book at the Karibu/ Gift tent. The scrapbook can have a slot for anyone interested in writing down advice. You can carry your scrapbook along with you during your honeymoon and read to each other what your guests said.

Requests your e-savvy wedding guests to email you messages of goodwill and have this projected on a screen for all to see. The messages can be displayed in a slideshow along with your wedding photos. This can be organized by your wedding videographer.

Have an open-mic session in between speeches. Give a few of your guests a chance to give you advice in between the reception program slots. You can have the mic facing the couple's table and the audience so that everyone has a good view.